Cookie Monster

Sometimes I feel like I am just watching myself make stupid decisions. I know I am participating in unhealthy behavior (like indulging in 5 cookies) but I seem to just think how awful it is and how very yummy they are. I have impulse control issues for sure. It seems like I do really well for a while and then as soon as I give myself permission to take a break and relax it is my signal to make stupid decisions and they don't count.

I know that portion control is also hugely important but lately it seems that I over do all these things  that should be a treat because when will I have another opportunity to enjoy them? My brain is working against me. I start the day out well but by the end of the day my will power or ability to resist is completely disintegrated.

I really want to hit the 70s but I am hovering around the mid 80s like they are home base. I know I have it in me to do it I just can't seem to get a hold of myself. I feel like being so busy with other things has made me feel like this is a second tier priority and that has made me lazy. I act like it gives me the perfect excuse to be reckless with my choices. I need to make walking a priority and not let myself have a different mentality on the weekends.

It is a crisis of mentality and I have to refocus my energy to remember what is important to me. I have to remember the choices I make are for a reason and every time I do something that contradicts my goals I am only making the efforts I have to make that much harder.

Just because I am busy doesn't mean that I can't still make being healthy and losing weight part of my life. I just have to get my crap together and make up my mind to do it.

<3Katie
Day 320
186lbs
Feeling like I need a pep talk

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